The Hardest Thing
by Red Moon Kree
Summary: Artemis must face the truth: he loves Holly, but he loves Juliet and must be with her. Will he leave Holly though? *songfic*


**This is a songfic to 98 Degrees' song, "The Hardest Thing". My future Artemis Fowl fics will not connect to this.**  
  
  
  
**We both know that I shouldn't be here.**  
  
**This is wrong.**  
  
**And baby it's killing me, it's killing you.**  
  
**Both of us trying to be strong.**  
  
  
  
Holly watched Artemis as he stared out the window. He had been doing this for the past three weeks. There was terrible melancholy in his eyes. It pained her to see him with so much sorrow in him. He never smiled now, and she knew exactly what the cause was.  
  
It was the letter.  
  
The letter that Juliet Butler had sent him. The one that told him how things were going along at home . . . with Angeline Fowl and her brother, Butler, and how she was and- How much she missed him. How much she loved him. How much she was practically dying of loneliness every night with tears soaking her pillow. And last, the promise he had made her to come running if she ever needed something.  
  
Artemis had never been very emotional, but after seeing him like this, one can't be that sure.  
  
Holly loved Artemis. She would die for him and give anything in the world to see him happy. But this? Why? Why? She had to be strong. She had to. For Artemis.  
  
**I've got somewhere else to be.**  
  
**Promises to keep. **  
  
1 **Someone else who loves me**  
  
**And trusts me fast asleep. **  
  
Artemis read the letter again, for the fiftieth time. Juliet loved him. She really did. After all these years of having that secret crush on her, but faithfully keeping his love for both Holly, and her, she loved him too. How could he live knowing that he was practically killing the one he loved? He wanted to go home. Home to everything. Home to his mother. Home to Butler. Home to Juliet.  
  
Then he glanced at Holly and saw her eyes filly with sadness as well. But how could he leave her? How could he leave Holly? But still, he felt that he just couldn't stay Underground anymore. Any longer.  
  
**I've made up my mind**  
  
**There is no turning back**  
  
**She's been good to me. **  
  
**And she deserves better than that. **  
  
"Holly?" Artemis came over to her.  
  
"Yes?" Holly trembled not looking up at him into his eyes.  
  
"I have to go back home. I have to. I have to be with my mother, my friend, and Juliet. I can't stay here anymore."  
  
"And you won't come back?"  
  
They were both silent. Silence, the deadliest thing that rang in Holly's Elfin ears. He wasn't coming back. He wasn't.  
  
"I'll come and visit. But I'm going to live with all the other Mud People up there." Artemis sighed. "You've been real good to me, Holly, and I want to thank you. But I know you don't deserve all this torture, and I can't let live this any longer."  
  
2 **It's the hardest thing**  
  
**I'll ever have to do**  
  
**To look you in the eye**  
  
**And tell you I don't love you. **  
  
**It's the hardest thing **  
  
**I'll ever have to lie**  
  
**To show no emotion **  
  
**When you start to cry. **  
  
Holly weakly smiled. "I'll help you get to the station. They'll give you a free ride up with me with you."  
  
"Holly . . . I . . . I love . . . ."  
  
Holly put a finger to Artemis's mouth and stopped him. "Don't waste that on me. It's Juliet you should be telling that to."  
  
They walked over to the station. The Underground travel to the Mud People's land had changed, but not by much. It was kind of an elevator, but it was much more comfortable to travel in. The guard let Holly pass and Artemis was ready to board his way home.  
  
"Artemis, can you do just one thing for me?" Holly asked, her eyes almost blurring.  
  
"Anything."  
  
"Tell me you don't love me." She whispered.  
  
Artemis, aghast at her wish, sighed. "I . . . I .. . .. don't . . . love . . . . you. . . ." His head dropped down.  
  
"You'd better hurry on. It will be leaving soon." Holly turned her head away, so he didn't that she was crying.  
  
Artemis tried to keep a straight face. It was the hardest thing though.  
  
3 **I can't let you see **  
  
4 **What you mean to me**  
  
5 **When my hands are tied**  
  
**And my heart's not free**  
  
**We're not meant to be. **  
  
Artemis knew that he really shouldn't show his emotions. It would make it worse for the both of them, but she really did mean a lot to him. She did, but they couldn't be together.  
  
  
  
**It's the hardest thing**  
  
**I'll ever have to do**  
  
**To turn around and walk away**  
  
**Pretending I don't love you. **  
  
He hugged her once, just once, so it wouldn't seem like he really didn't love her, and got onto the "elevator". The doors closed and he sat down and peered out the window, never taking his eyes off Holly. She became smaller and smaller and smaller. Finally he couldn't see her anymore. He sighed, and then he cried the rest of the way. He did love her.  
  
**I know we'll meet again. **  
  
**Fate has a place and time**  
  
**So you can go on with your life**  
  
**I've got to be cruel to be kind. **  
  
**Like Dr. Zhivago**  
  
**All the love I'll be sending**  
  
**And you will never know**  
  
**Cuz there can be no happy ending. **  
  
Juliet embraced Artemis warmly. He kissed her and she returned the kiss. For once in three weeks, he felt happy again. Truly happy.  
  
"It's been a year since I've seen you! It's so good to see you again!" Juliet exclaimed.  
  
"Same to you . . . ." Artemis smiled with tears in his eyes.  
  
"I love you." Juliet whispered.  
  
"I love you too."  
  
They kissed again. Juliet looked around, noticing that Holly wasn't there. "Where is Holly?"  
  
"She wanted to stay. Plus, well, Root didn't want her to go up, because . . . . she had her job." Artemis lied.  
  
"Oh, well, we'll come and visit her soon." Juliet smiled.  
  
So did Artemis. "Yes. We will."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Holly dodged all of the troll's attacks. She had grown, quicker, stronger, and better than any other recruit on LEPrecon. Now, all she had to do was eliminate the biggest problem that had been terrorizing the Underground and the People, the troll.  
  
It was huger than any other troll LEP had fought in its entire history. The troll was wider than three buildings and taller than four. It picked up one and threw it towards Holly.  
  
She jumped out of its way but it was too late to see that the troll had already picked up a few of the signs on the street and threw them all on top of her.  
  
She aimed her gun and shot seven times at the neck. The troll, unable to breathe, fell down dead.  
  
All twenty one of the signs toppled on top of her though, and she whispered something and closed her eyes, knowing that life was finally taken away from her.  
  
  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Artemis woke up abruptly, trembling, shivering, shuddering with fear. "I love you". He heard Holly's voice. He did. He swore he heard it.  
  
There was a knock on the door. Artemis jumped out of bed and ran down the stairs to the door. He swung it open.  
  
It was Commander Root.  
  
He looked much different than he had ever looked before. His face was kindly, but sad. Tears were running down his face. He held his head down at first, and then looked up to face Artemis.  
  
"Commander . . . . what happened?" Artemis forced this terrible question out of his mouth.  
  
"Artemis . . . . I'm sorry to report, but Captain Short . . . Holly has saved the People . . . and died in their place."  
  
**Plz review . . . .** 


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